Inspiring Confidence in Your Child

Confidence is a very important aspect of child development. With confidence, it is easier for your child to accomplish tasks. It helps with learning and socialising, amongst many other important life skills.

Your confidence is her confidence
The number one thing to do is to believe in your child. She depends on you for many things, and seeks for your approval. And, unlike adults, children can’t talk themselves into something. Her confidence erodes when setbacks, criticism, and failure occur repeatedly and no one encourages her. If not caught in time, this forms a lifelong habit or even personality. You need to project confidence in your child.

Here’s a list of practical tips:

•  Focus on the positive: “Hey, you have two left socks on. But you got the colours right!”
•  Praise for effort: “That was a really good try!”
•  Convey how precious she is to you: “You are the best, Jenny, I know.”
•  Encourage trying: “That seems tough, but I believe you can do it!”
•  Expect good behaviour: “I expect you to be nice and tidy your toy.”
•  Be polite: “Thank you for wiping the table. I appreciate it.”

Even when disciplining your child, focus on what she can do better:

•  Ignore bad behaviour: Let her know that bad behaviour is not the right way to gain your attention or approval. Refrain the urge to shout at her.
•  Criticise the behaviour, not the child: Focus on the action, reaffirming that you love her enough and she doesn’t have to do that.
•  Use carrots and sticks only when necessary: You should neither mollycoddle nor over-discipline your child.

As you may have noticed, your opinion of your child is crucial to her development. Research has shown that even in the most positive households, children hear twice as many negative comments than positive ones. So always have a praise ready. It is important for her!